HolistiCinintya

Hi beloved readers, Kali ini aku akan membahas bagaimana aku bisa sampai di Kanada. Aku sekarang tinggal dan bersekolah di Kanada sudah 1 tahun. Berkuliah di luar negeri merupakan mimpi terbesarku. Sebelum tamat SMA, aku berusaha mengikuti tes beasiswa ke luar negeri, namun apa daya kemampuanku tidak mencukupi, dari segi pengetahuan maupun finansial, jadi kuurungkan niatku. Hidup harus terus berjalan, jadi aku putuskan untuk mencari universitas dekat rumah, Universitas terbaik di provinsiku, Bali.   Singkat cerita aku lulus ujian SNMPTN universitas di Jurusan Komunikasi, Fakultas Ilmu Sosial dan Ilmu Politik, Universitas Udayana. Sangat bersyukur rasanya dan senang bisa lulus dengan kemampuanku sendiri. Aku membutuhkan waktu 5 tahun bolak balik menyelesaikan skripsi dan meluluskan diri dari dunia perkuliahan dan sepak terjangnya. Setelah lulus “NOW WHAT?” udah gitu aja? Sekian terimakasih hahaha bercanda. Aku lupa dimana awal mula pembicaraan kanada ...

She was a side dishes for his main course She was a figurant to support his main character She was sub player for his game She gave his best to be his side She thought it was her love story but actually she's in the middle someone else love story She thought she was the main character and the spotlight was hers She thought she was a center of the party but she was only a third party Such a well played game

Today, Life was hitting me so hard Holycow! This is really really hurt My chest is pain, it used to hurt on a left side when it started to break, Now It is hurt so bad, from the center and spread to every inchies of my lungs It's like Wolverin's claw  has ripped it into smallest pieces It caused a lot of cursing I can't fckin calm!!! I am freakin' mad!!! I consumed too much bul*sh*t  from you Oh My God I am so sorry, I should have wished you guys the best However I couldn't be that wise and super-girl at the moment Otherwise my prayer will end up become a disaster

I do exactly know that you are not my purpose  I mean I know I don’t want you and vice versa But I don’t know why this thought about you appear out of nowhere I do miss you, I am glad when you said that you missed me, I don’t know if you mean it or just play with me But I do like it when you said it to me As soon as you show yourself in front of me, I feel relieved You called my name just to trap me on your spell again I answered you from space between us I know it tortured you, This is what I want, keeping my energy exclusively from you I know no sorrow that I need to through when you are not around Because I know you’ll always be around But sometimes I do journey to the past just to remind me how good it was love

Thank you for being half cure of him Thank you for being brutally honest to me all the time However I realized He's the one who can cure me completely I can't stop visioning about him and me Imagining we have 2 little angels between us It's always a little too much But I love those corny thought I was being coward, facing him become my biggest fear Nevertheless today My subsconcious self is craving heart to heart conversation I know I am the fool from the first time Let's see, as soon as I met him, I will run into him with no hesitation That's all I want to do Embracing my comfort zone

Giving myself up from love pain drama No doubt I still believe in “Love Conquers All” phrase I just pull myself a moment to take a break and remind to breathe  Then begin to wish again Dear Shooting star, Bring me the reality , I am brave enough to see it I bare my heart wishes I could see that brutally honest gentle creature I don’t mind he talks too much, I would love to listen what his heart’s trying to tell me I don’t mind he doesn’t promise me love but keep going adventure He doesn’t need to be that romantic sweet talker, he shouldn’t be Bringing me bold real feeling, not from that love story movie scene but our own story

I miss him everyday unexpectedly I’ve been thinking about him a lot these past few weeks I really want to stop sinking deeply from my beautiful vision about him But I couldn’t help myself, everyday with you was so beautiful I was day dreaming about us a lil bit too much, smile a lot like a fool Does he even real?   This foggy thought try to warn me  However I just let myself fall to your fairy tale I thought you are the one, I thought you were going to be my happiness My first of all and my conclusion Ya, You are too good to be true And expectedly end up like everyone who gave me the same ending